Finding My Way by Heidi McLaughlin

Author:Heidi McLaughlin [McLaughlin, Heidi]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Published: 2014-03-29T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 27

I tie the black tie my grandmother bought for me and let it hang against the freshly ironed white shirt. I have to wear a jacket tonight, but at this point in my life I’ll do anything my grandma asks me to do.

Tonight, she’s having a gathering as she calls it. What I found out from her housekeeper is that her gatherings include somewhere between fifty to one hundred people coming here to have cocktails and discuss Hollywood gossip. I’ve also learned, in the last two months, that my grandma can gossip with the best of them.

I’ve yet to perform since I’ve been here and even though that should bother me, it doesn’t. It’s giving me time to fine-tune my stage performance. I play in front of my grandma and the house staff all the time. They all say I’m good and can’t wait to see me perform on stage. My grandma has offered to make some calls, but I told her that I need to do this on my own, no handouts. I know she wants to help, but I need to struggle. I need to feel like I’m accomplishing something for everything I’ve left behind.

I don’t know what to expect from tonight. I do know a lot of industry people will be here and we’ll be mingling. In all my years, I’ve never mingled. I’m not even sure I know how to mingle or be social. I am promised that no one will ask about where I came from or what I’m doing. Betty simply told them that her grandson has come to live with her.

Living here has been interesting. Navigating the streets is a nightmare and I know why my grandma has a driver, but I refuse to let Stan drive me anywhere. I have to learn my way around. I can’t show up at a gig with a driver. That screams rich spoiled kid and that is something I’m not.

I slip my arms into my jacket and stand in front of the mirror. Everything about me is different. My hair is longer. The bags are gone from under my eyes. I feel like I stand taller even though I know it’s not possible. I’ve taken full advantage of the swimming pool that’s on the grounds and agreed when my grandma ordered a weight set for me to use. As much as I’m over football, I’m not over my physique and do want to keep that.

Days after I arrived, my grandma and I sat in her theater room and watched her old movies. We ate popcorn, laughed and she even cried a little. It’s amazing to see her on screen and then sitting across from me at dinner in the same day. Each day that I’m getting with her is a blessing. She’s truly an amazing woman and the fact that she’s been kept from me for so long makes me more resentful toward my parents. They have no idea what they’re missing.

When she pulled out

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